norovirus? implosive diarrhea.
It’s just Trump on a rally tour again. Explosive Diarrhea is his SS codename.
Fire in the hole
Who needs a poop knife, I have diarrhea!
It’s and old reference, sir, but it checks out.
Huh… I thought that was just people setting off fireworks early.
Edit: So immediately after posting this comment, I got a text from my apartment management about not setting off fireworks in the complex. Spooky.
WE’RE ALWAYS WATCHING, CITIZEN.
Can confirm had diarrhea this morning
"Cyclosporiasis is caused by eating food or drinking water contaminated by feces containing the parasite. Historically, people would acquire it outside the United States.
However, of the 190 cases reported to public health authorities between the start of May and the middle of June, 145 involve someone who hasn’t traveled beyond US borders in the last couple of weeks."
Just say it, the US is a shithole country now so of course we are starting to get awful diseases locally.
eating food or drinking water contaminated by feces
The fuck are you doing, America?!
Washing hands is woke!
While this doesn’t happen often, it’s not unheard of. You might remember an outbreak from 2018 linked to salads sold by McDonald’s.
See? Not the first time. Last time it happened was 2 years into-
Does this have anything to do with how we deregulated all the food production and gutted the FDA and replaced everyone there with lobbiests from the companies that produce food? Or something like that?
Couldn’t be.
Yeah, that’s just the free market. The invisible hand.
…sharting to get awful diseases…am I right?!?
Headline hits differently if you read it while on the toilet.
Especially if you have diarrhea 🤣
Everyone get inside!
A true shitpost. As I’m taking a shit, no less. Bravo.
In all honesty, you should probably leave it behind.
Oh nos, better ask RFK what we should do. I’m sure he will know the answer…
Go for a swim in a cesspool to build up your tolerance
ObviouslyBuild up his tolerance so that he can poison us all
Hmm, thought for sure there would be some racoon dick involved but a nice swamp swim sounds about right.
Quick everyone jump in the reflecting pool
This was the worms plan all along…
Build immunity by snorting the leftover sprays from the seat.
Better load up on more horse paste…
Wait but this exact disease is literally what ivermectin treats successfully lol
Well now I don’t want it! >:(
Yes, in horses
And in humans, it’s one of the most essential medications in developing nations
Swim in it!
5th dimension antimatter fluoride worms. I’m calling it now. That’s why CERN moved the antimatter across campus to flush it into the underworld system.
At this point, the shitpost comm is going to be able to just actually focus on literal shit related stories.
reality is enshitttifying aughguhah!
Hasn’t there been a “surge of explosive diarrhea” running the country since the 20th of January 2025?
that’s technically a bolus of explosive diarrhea
The Noah Kahan concert I incident makes more sense now.
