OP is getting a lot of downvotes. I assume, from straight guys who are offended at this notion. As a straight guy myself, I understand their frustration. But straight up (ha!) - if you are a straight guy who is pissed off by this message, you are fucking up.
Why? Because it’s the truth. Go outside, go touch some grass, and observe how women interact with each other (or with obviously gender non-conforming people). They hug as soon as they meet. They give each other compliments. They ask for contact info and proactively make plans to spend time together. In the context of this post, this is what is meant by “treating them like a human”. It isn’t just basic respect. It is giving them a feeling of warmth, support, and acceptance.
So if you’re a guy, and you feel like the world is cold, unsupportive, and unwelcoming - great! Here is some validation of that feeling! You are right! Enjoy the ego boost!
But also - now you know this information. And this is good, because even though it feels bad to know that half the planet doesnt trust you by default while they trust the other half implicitly, it also points you in the right direction for solving your problem.
Here’s the thing. Women do, in fact, like to fuck. Even with men?? Yes! But what they don’t like is dealing with the emotional turmoil of guys who want to fuck them that they don’t want to fuck back. This could come in two forms:
The guy who asks them out, clearly a bundle of nerves that could explode into rage or tears at any moment. A lot has been said about how women have legitimate fears about men becoming violent or vindictive when they are turned down, but I don’t think this is worth focusing on, because we’re all very nice people here who wouldn’t do anything to hurt someone else even if we feel bad about getting rejected. However, I think it is also important to keep in mind that most women are nice and they feel bad about making someone feel bad by rejecting them. And so if you ask a woman out and will clearly feel bad if she rejects you, then when she rejects you she will also feel bad, which is an emotional load on her, and she doesn’t like that.
The guy who never asks them out, but who is clearly into them. The guy who always shows up, sticks by her side at every moment, laughs too hard at all of her jokes. This guy is annoying. Maybe if he just asked her out when they first met, she’d be into him, but he just keeps hanging around, making her constantly feel his now-unwanted attraction. But she can’t tell him to go away, or that she isn’t interested in him, because then she would feel like a presumptuous bitch. So she feels stuck, always trying to shake this guy off or avoid him whenever he shows up.
So the solution is simple. Don’t be those guys. Literally all you need to do is not pin your self worth to whether or not any particular girl likes you. If your see a girl you are interested in, then go say hi and have a normal fucking conversation. Then, at a point in time when it wouldn’t be awkward as fuck, just say “hey, btw, I think you’re gorgous/adorable/super interesting/a total baddie/the girl with the best hair here. Wanna go out sometime?” If she says yes, great! Maybe she even wants to make out right now! If she says no, also great, you have a new friend and you can release whatever nerves you had about whether or not an attractive stranger likes you.
Relevant
OP is getting a lot of downvotes. I assume, from straight guys who are offended at this notion. As a straight guy myself, I understand their frustration. But straight up (ha!) - if you are a straight guy who is pissed off by this message, you are fucking up.
Why? Because it’s the truth. Go outside, go touch some grass, and observe how women interact with each other (or with obviously gender non-conforming people). They hug as soon as they meet. They give each other compliments. They ask for contact info and proactively make plans to spend time together. In the context of this post, this is what is meant by “treating them like a human”. It isn’t just basic respect. It is giving them a feeling of warmth, support, and acceptance.
So if you’re a guy, and you feel like the world is cold, unsupportive, and unwelcoming - great! Here is some validation of that feeling! You are right! Enjoy the ego boost!
But also - now you know this information. And this is good, because even though it feels bad to know that half the planet doesnt trust you by default while they trust the other half implicitly, it also points you in the right direction for solving your problem.
Here’s the thing. Women do, in fact, like to fuck. Even with men?? Yes! But what they don’t like is dealing with the emotional turmoil of guys who want to fuck them that they don’t want to fuck back. This could come in two forms:
The guy who asks them out, clearly a bundle of nerves that could explode into rage or tears at any moment. A lot has been said about how women have legitimate fears about men becoming violent or vindictive when they are turned down, but I don’t think this is worth focusing on, because we’re all very nice people here who wouldn’t do anything to hurt someone else even if we feel bad about getting rejected. However, I think it is also important to keep in mind that most women are nice and they feel bad about making someone feel bad by rejecting them. And so if you ask a woman out and will clearly feel bad if she rejects you, then when she rejects you she will also feel bad, which is an emotional load on her, and she doesn’t like that.
The guy who never asks them out, but who is clearly into them. The guy who always shows up, sticks by her side at every moment, laughs too hard at all of her jokes. This guy is annoying. Maybe if he just asked her out when they first met, she’d be into him, but he just keeps hanging around, making her constantly feel his now-unwanted attraction. But she can’t tell him to go away, or that she isn’t interested in him, because then she would feel like a presumptuous bitch. So she feels stuck, always trying to shake this guy off or avoid him whenever he shows up.
So the solution is simple. Don’t be those guys. Literally all you need to do is not pin your self worth to whether or not any particular girl likes you. If your see a girl you are interested in, then go say hi and have a normal fucking conversation. Then, at a point in time when it wouldn’t be awkward as fuck, just say “hey, btw, I think you’re gorgous/adorable/super interesting/a total baddie/the girl with the best hair here. Wanna go out sometime?” If she says yes, great! Maybe she even wants to make out right now! If she says no, also great, you have a new friend and you can release whatever nerves you had about whether or not an attractive stranger likes you.