• kikutwo@lemmy.world
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    3 hours ago

    You are in control of how you react, not the abuser. Just like your shitty attitude, that was your choice because you are a pseudo intellectualist.

      • kikutwo@lemmy.world
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        19 minutes ago

        My wife was about fifty at the time she was seeing this PhD not talking about children.

      • kikutwo@lemmy.world
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        17 minutes ago

        Key Perspectives on this Statement: Pro-Assertion (Empowerment): This view, often shared by therapists like Nicole Symcox and Karen Koenig, argues that our feelings stem from our own interpretations of events, not the events themselves. It is designed to stop people from feeling like victims of others’ actions. Con-Assertion (Contextual): Critics, such as Therapist Jeff, argue that this phrase is “wrong, mostly” because it ignores the human need for connection and the reality that actions (especially abuse or trauma) can cause immediate, involuntary, and valid emotional pain. The Nuance: The statement is most effective when interpreted as: “You can control your reaction to what people do,” rather than, “You shouldn’t feel hurt by what people do”. Reddit Reddit +4 If this advice makes your wife feel dismissed, it might be an example of accidental emotional invalidation, which can cause confusion and self-doubt. The goal should be to acknowledge feelings while also developing skills to not let others’ behavior dictate one’s entire emotional state. Reddit Reddit +3